


Will I Be You? Or Will You Be Me?

by fangirling-feels (xGwenxVeerx)



Category: LOONA (Korea Band)
Genre: Character Study, Let Me In - music video, Light Angst, Music Video study, Running, as well as during the love choerry motion mv, basically just my take on a bunch of theories while writing about the let me in video, double haseul theory, loonaverse, takes place in iceland
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-07
Updated: 2020-02-07
Packaged: 2021-02-19 03:42:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,431
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22604596
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xGwenxVeerx/pseuds/fangirling-feels
Summary: The moon risesAnd I am becoming youWe were so differentBut my heartIs now being colored with you
Comments: 1
Kudos: 3





	Will I Be You? Or Will You Be Me?

Every cell in my body screamed that I was tired, from the ache in my feet to the steady burn in my legs. I had been traveling, running away from home in search of something for so long that I had forgotten when I even started running. Ever since YeoJin had disappeared and the foreign girl had joined our class, I’ve been having the feeling that I couldn’t stay at home. Had there been something I could’ve done to make sure YeoJin would still be safe and at home?

I remembered the expression on HeeJin’s and HyunJin’s faces, the heartbreak we had all shared when we first found out that YeoJin was gone. The confusion upon, not even a day later, being introduced to ViVi as our new classmate. The pain and shame I had felt when I realised that I had to go away.

Not that I had any idea where I was going to. I just knew that there was somewhere I had to be, somewhere other than home. A place out there calling for me. No matter how much I tried finding an explanation for these feelings, I simply couldn’t.

So I ran away.

It was hard leaving home behind, especially after all the strange events from the past week, but ever since I left it felt like those puzzle pieces I had tried time and time again to put together were finally falling into its place. A tiny part deep inside of me kept saying that it felt off, that I should have ignored the strange feelings inside my gut, that I should have stayed home and that everything would have been okay. It wouldn’t, that’s what I knew for certain, because staying behind meant ignoring whatever was going on, and I owed it to at least YeoJin to try and do something. Find her. Get her back.

I couldn’t help but get the feeling that there had been another girl along with YeoJin, with brown hair and a bright smile, that had disappeared as well, but that feeling disappeared as soon as it came. Instead, I tried to tell myself that I was merely imagining things. Had I even told anyone about my own feelings and doubts? Perhaps I had, but ever since YeoJin disappeared my life had been turned upside down so much, and I couldn’t distinguish what I had and hadn’t done from each other. It had all become blurry, entangled in each other, and sometimes I felt like I was stuck in a loop, my life stuck on repeat, and no matter how much I tried, the loop never seemed to end.

Maybe I had told HyunJin something about it. The girl seemed to be stuck in her world as of recently, and I wouldn’t put it past either one of us if anything had slipped but we simply had forgotten about it.

It was strange how determined I felt to find whatever it was my heart was longing for, even when I couldn’t tell you what it was. Every time I got a step further on my journey, my mind clearing up a bit, my heart turning the slightest bit surer, I simply knew this was the path I had to continue on.

_ I hadn’t meant to slip away. _

_ Even long before Choerry left I knew someone had come to look for me. I couldn’t tell you what had tipped me off, no matter how hard I tried or how much YeoJin had annoyed me about it, asking me what those feelings exactly were. All I knew was that someone went looking for me, and that all there was left to do for me was waiting for the best moment to leave the other two girls behind. Slowly, but surely, until I was too far away from both Choerry and YeoJin for them to still find me. I would find them back anyway when this would all be over. _

_ I was surprised it had taken the other girl so long to find me. _

_ If Choerry had been here, she would have probably said that the girl approaching me could pass off as my long lost twin. YeoJin would have probably joked that the girl was still Haseul, but merely one from another universe. I could only look at the girl as she was approaching me, her long hair catching in the wind. I couldn’t quite see the similarities between the two of us, but I knew that those ideas weren’t as strange as they sounded. _

The first time I thought I had found what I was searching for was when I accidentally took down a little bird. I hadn’t meant for that to happen. At first I thought I had seen somebody, another person, and I had thrown a rock I had found on the ground at it. The rock actually hit them, however, and they had fallen down. I had wanted to go up to them, to check if they were wounded and if I could do anything to help them, even if it had been my fault they were in this situation, but upon getting closer, the only thing I had found was a dead bird lying on the ground.

Will I be you? Or will you be me?

**She had come so close, but it wasn’t time yet. Had it already been, perhaps? Was she too late, too far away when she shouldn’t have been there, too long on the run? Perhaps their time would come again, but for now, neither girls could tell.** **  
** **Or maybe this was their time, the shift in the air barely noticeable as the girls continued with their search, unknowing of the events that had passed.**

**Where they ever even to know what was going to happen?**

_ It had hurt, when the other girl had come closer, I wouldn’t lie about that. There had been a pain, spreading from my head all over to the rest of my body, and I knew I was hurt so badly that I must have fallen down and blacked out.  _

_ When I woke up again, the other girl wasn’t there anymore. It was hard to say how I knew that she was gone, because my surroundings were still the same, except for the small white bird that was lying on the ground next to me and the strange determination in my soul to go out and find somebody. _

_ Something inside of me told me that I already knew who i was looking for, that I could finally turn around and go home. I couldn’t remember where home was. Images of girls with long, brown hair flashed by, a feeling of recognition followed by confusion, and all I wanted to do was run away.  _

_ I walked towards what felt like home instead. _

I was running. Had I always been running? I didn’t know, couldn’t tell, but it certainly felt that way. My legs were aching, almost as if I hadn’t stopped running in a long time. How had I ended up here? I didn’t know, all I knew was that I was running to somewhere, someone, a place I would be safe even if I couldn’t tell from what. And so I kept running, for as far as my legs could carry, until I arrived at an old looking house. YeoJin was sitting on the front porch, with another girl sitting next to her, who shone the light of the sun in my eyes with a round mirror she was holding. It was almost as if they were waiting for my return.

I had the strange feeling that something had happened to YeoJin before, but I couldn’t tell before what. My mind was trying to tell my that YeoJin shouldn’t have been here, that she couldn’t have been here because she was gone, but none of my thoughts and feelings made any sense, so I tried to shake them off, walking towards the girls instead.

  
  
  


_ The moonlight lit up the path in front of me, and the darkness surrounding me comforted me as I made my way home. I still couldn’t quite place where I was, because none of my surroundings seemed familiar in any way to me. _

_ Two girls had clearly been waiting for me, even if I couldn’t recognise me, but they immediately started talking to me when I entered what I assumed to be my home. It wasn’t until they started talking about their new classmate, a pink haired girl named ViVi, that I knew I was here with a reason. _

_ I had to find her. _

**Author's Note:**

> Originally, this piece was written for a comeback project for B#RN, back around May of last year. As the comeback got pushed back more and more, and we got less and less information on when the comeback would actually be, the project eventually—sadly—got postponed. Still, I want to thank all the writers and artists involved in this project, I'm so incredibly proud of all that you've done. I cannot wait to work with all of you again—hopefully we get to make another project for the next release, and actually get it finished and posted in time for the comeback. The biggest thank you to Chloe from loona_usa on twitter for allowing me to be on the project, writing for haseul, and for doing all the best you could with the project. I'm proud of all of you!
> 
> Although I'm sad that the project never got published, I'm happy that I can finally show you all this piece that I poured my heart and soul into. There is a second part to this, written for My Melody/Love&Live/Sonatine, that I can hopefully get posted soon, so I hope you all will be back for that as well!
> 
> I hope you all like this work, and if you do, please leave a kudo, a nice comment, come follow me on my twitter (@sweetyeojinnie) where you can talk to me about anything, share this with other fellow orbits, shout it from the rooftops, accidentally share it in a groupchat with classmates, whatever you want to do with it! Also make sure to stream the So What music video, stages, and album online, vote for LOONA on Mwave and Starplay, and stan loona!
> 
> Love you all so much!


End file.
